Rae Roy

I don't know what to say. Why can't all people see how beautiful diversity is? The ability to think differently is a good thing. Having diverse viewpoints solves problems more completely. I've lived in Canada my entire life. Going on 36 years. I realize that this isn't long to some, but I've never seen such hate. People used to just let others be. Live and let live. There's a synagogue in my hometown of 50,000 and no one cared about it being there. It was just another church. There were many Christian churches of a variety of faiths (Protestant, Baptist, Anglican, Catholic, Born Again, etc) and everyone just did their thing. Hell, I went to Catholic school despite being the wrong kind of Catholic to take the communion host. There was a whole group of us as my first school decided to become 100% French and they sent those of us from English families to an English school. So during mass, we just sat and respectfully watched everyone else do their thing. I even rem...

[caption id="attachment_4711" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bit Strips.[/caption] I prefer to live my life in the middle or Goldilocks zone. In a place of harmony. Whenever there is an argument, I sympathize with both sides because I usually see logically valid points on both sides. Social things often distress me because there isn't a clear answer to most issues. Life is stressful enough without people who would rather pile more on. The wrong kind of stress kills people in a myriad of ways. Going forward, I'm not tolerating it in my life.  But there is good stress as well. We experience this at the start of a new relationship. We wonder if the other person likes us as much as we like them. When will we kiss? Will the kiss be good? Will we be compatible in other ways? We also experience the good stress when we're doing a job we are passionate about. When we accomplish our goals. When we learn something like an instrument ...

[caption id="attachment_7953" align="alignright" width="300"] Image from quotationof.com[/caption] Today, I feel like I just want to be a kid and let an adult take care of the mess. But I can't do this. I'm the adult. So I started the day with dishes. I hate dishes and laundry the most of all house chores. They're never ending like an MMORPG that isn't fun, but is only a grindfest. Lately, I've been struggling a lot as my newsfeed fills with disturbing information pertaining to Trump's America. I know I'm not the only one. I've been struggling to find words at all for this, let alone the right ones. I'm unsure if I've found them or not, but I'm trying. Largely, I'm a believer in peace. I believe life is precious. Maybe because my mother was told to abort me. Maybe because during my childhood, I attended my first funeral at age six and nearly every year after that I lost another family member and sometimes mo...

There was an article that recently came out where a restaurant claims that they can't keep their business open because of people bringing their own cake. A shit storm has followed on social media about whether or not it is right to bring any outside food to a restaurant. People on both sides have good points. Some say those with food allergies should be exempt. Others say diners don't have the right to expect that they can have dessert even if there isn't something on the menu they can eat. Others say people with food allergies don't have the right to eat anywhere but their homes (Ignorant much?). Oh, and still more say dessert isn't necessary, so just go without or eat something when you get home because that's what they do. I think it's absolutely fucking ridiculous that people are wasting their time on this for a number of reasons. In many non-American countries, they're happy to have you bring your own cake to restaurants because it lets you enjoy yo...

Today, I had my visual fields test and eye check up. The visual fields test is rather like a crappy videogame. You press a button each time you see a light. It's crappy because it isn't fun to sit in an uncomfortable way while you wear an eye patch and you aren't allowed to move. Because my eyes run dry, it's extra uncomfortable for me. I have to blink multiple times to keep my eyes from heading into emergency tearing mode. Sometimes we even have to pause. We tried to pause today and the machine got angry and decided we had to start over. I was almost done with the right eye. In theory, the tests aren't that long, but preservatives in eye drops and bright lights all cause me pain. My eye doctor doesn't do the puff of air to check for glaucoma. She uses advanced photographic imaging to look at my optic nerve and the health of my eye along with her own eyes and bright lights. Does that mean the puff of air was no good at checking for glaucoma? Not at all. Many eye...

Yesterday was a bad day for me. My general practitioner admitted to refusing to refer me to specialists. He was dismissive of my concerns and told me other patients were more important to him than I was. Who the hell does that? I was livid. He told me that if I didn't like it, I was free to seek a different doctor. Obviously, I'm changing doctors, but I'm not leaving it there. How many other people has he done this to? After talking with some friends, I have decided to submit a formal complaint to the college of physicians. Because there's never a reason to be treated the way I was. I hate conflict. I hate having to put a complaint in. But I once knew a wonderful man who died of stage 4 lung cancer that wasn't diagnosed because a doctor decided he just needed to lose weight and refused to probe further. And I shouldn't have to. Canada is known for good health care. But it's only as good as the people providing that care. I'm also pissed off at people tha...

I don't have one particular thing on my mind for Thoughtful Thursday, so I'll ramble about life, martial arts, French, and writing today. WordPress is acting strangely for me today, so I'll apologize in advance for any possibly strange formatting and such. It has been deleting things after I type them... Life My bank accounts have all been sorted out. Unfortunately, I am not currently eligible for overdraft protection due to my currently unemployed state. It doesn't matter that EI will be paying me nearly as much as what I netted when I was working. It also doesn't matter that one pays income tax on EI. Ah well, I'll be able to eat and pay for my mortgage and my other expenses. Self employment would count if I was actually making money off of my writing or any other venture. I think I'm getting somewhere on cleaning my condo. Some days it's hard to tell. I find something that needs to be gone through and that makes an area messier before it gets clean. T...

This weekend has been all over the map. Friday turned out unexpectedly good. As you may recall, I was dreading my appointment. I don't really like going on in winter unless I'm doing something with friends. By registering with this one recruiter, I had the option of being registered with another. I'm now registered with three recruiters in Ottawa, so triple the chances of getting work! After the appointment, I went on a search to get tickets for the bus. I didn't find the store for them, but at this corner the bus that takes me really close to home, the bus I can never catch, was right on the corner and despite not having the proper funds, the busdriver let me on. I had too little change or a $10 bill. I put in a ticket for excellent customer service without mentioning exactly what he did as I don't want him to get in trouble. It was really cold that day too! I pulled together a decent supper with a glass wine and managed to gobble my food down before it was time fo...

On Thursday, I was preoccupied with an appointment and treating myself to pho. I really didn't have a lot to post anyway. This week has been rather relaxed. Well, relaxed for me. I queried another agent for The Page & The Magician and searched for my next query possibility. It's still nerve-wracking to click send. I have an appointment this afternoon with a recruiter. Last night, my activities turned to job searching. EI hasn't mailed me to say I'm approved. I'm not sure what's going on there. Hopefully something comes through soon. I've been making progress on cleaning my main living areas. I can see my kitchen counter. I can't remember the last time that happened. Last year was extremely busy with conventions and seminars. I expect I'll do less this year given my current income status. I have a short story to work on this morning and writers group tonight, so I best get out of my too comfy bed and get on those things. Have a good weekend! Ciao,...

[caption id="attachment_4711" align="alignleft" width="300"] Image created using Bit Strips.[/caption] A lot of my weekend was more challenging than I would've prefered, but that's life sometimes. Videos Well, I spent a large chunk of the weekend trying to find video software that I don't hate. I haven't been successful. This is what I want. Filmora's easy mode, but don't force a theme on me or music. I like how easy it is to plunk a photo or two in and then have your main video and then another photo. The problem is that they force music and a theme and then your video is like some kind of animated scrapbook instead of a video and the parts where you are talking are gone. I don't want to deal with things frame by frame. It's too much for me to handle mentally, visually, etc. I want something simple, but useful. And I'm getting really tired of applications that are listed on websites as free, then you download it and an...

[caption id="attachment_4712" align="alignleft" width="300"] Image created using Bit Strips.[/caption] Editing is complete on The Page & The Magician. Well, until an agent or publisher tells me to fix something. This last revision was about making sure the story flowed, fixing grammar and tense issues, and being clever. In correcting flow, I found some spots where I had thrown something in that either didn't jive with the story or I forgot to finish something. A package never got delivered, and that had to be fixed. In being clever, sometimes the smallest changes can add so much to a story. After a great conversation with a friend, I added hints that my world was bigger than the immediate story. I also made tiny changes like the species of a flower to increase meaning. As I've said before, I write in layers. I don't know what layers are beyond this. I've taken my novel as far as I can alone. With this complete, I have a little breathin...

I submitted my first ever query letter this week. It was hard to describe all the elements of my book in a couple of paragraphs. It's urban fantasy erotica. I didn't talk about the sex scenes. They are, of course, part of the story, but there is more than sex going on and I wanted the agent to hear about the basic story and get an idea of the key things that happen. It's really hard to do that when you've spent so much time making sure all the pieces go together like breadcrumbs making a trail. I figured they would guess there is sex in it judging by my putting it in the erotica category. I wanted to tell them the whole wonderful story, but there isn't enough room nor do they have enough time. I just hope I gave them enough to pique their interest and give me a chance. I was still holding my breath after I clicked on the submit button. It's a mix of fear and excitement. I suppose I should submit to some other agents too. Eggs in one basket and all that. With mar...

So far this year, I've been going at things in a balanced way. On New Year's Day, I edited a chapter, had pancakes with a tasty hazelnut syrup a friend brought me, watched an episode of The OA (really enjoying this show), and then read the prologue of the first book in my 2017 reading list. After a web surfing break, I edited another chapter, tried to play piano, and had a challenging night with Skyrim. So challenging, I had to start a new character that is resistant to disease so maybe she won't get turned into a vampire and get attacked on site everywhere she goes. I just want to run around killing and crafting things! Anyway, I'm trying to patiently wait for something to arrive so I can start doing more cool things this year. I want to do more videos